Bad Dreams Unmask Fears

I woke up this morning an hour before I wanted to and threw up. I've never had a nightmare that made me vomit. Never. This one did.

I will not write about the dream. Just tried to. It upset me. I had my revenge, though. To give you an idea of how bad this dream was, at one point I said the to human pig that had done wrong, "... and if you try to run, I'll nail your breasts to that table. You won't be going too far then."

Yeah, that was not a fun night.

I got to go to work soon. Do some good. I was going to make a post office run today, but it being the busiest mailing day of the year, and me being of short temper does not make it seem like a good idea. I've got a lot to do tonight and not enough time to do it. Story of my life. My desk is a mess. It bothers me to look at it.

Sat in the jacuzzi last night. Had played soccer (the real football) with my daughter earlier in the day and twisted funny while going for the ball. Later, my daughter kicked the ball so hard that it went off my knee into my nose. Her response? "You okay? Well, you aren't bleeding, let's go." She called her team the Bone Breaking Tigers. I really like that. It's a strong image. That's my girl. There is something every day that she says or does where I can see myself in her.

I ache. I don't heal like I did when I was 20. There is comfort in that. The miles have worn me down, but I like it. Makes me feel ready for whatever is coming.

Worked on my synopsis some more. Can't get this manuscript overview down just right. Have just a few paragraphs to sell it. It's a tough one. The story is simple. It's meant to be. The next one will be a deep examination of violence unleashed. It will bother me to write a lot of it, but it must be done. I have some great ideas for it. I won't send it to the publisher who found this current manuscript to be too depressing. I wouldn't want to send him off the deep end.

Xmess is almost here. The zombies are flooding the mall, the floors slick with their drool. Got to be there next Saturday and Sunday. That's never fun. Good for zombie watching and listening to their attempted conversations, which are little more than grunts and phrases learned from television commercials.

Arsenal won. Eagles won. Good on both counts. Arsenal is looked at as sometimes being arrogant. Eagles have Vick, whose transgressions are well documented. He had a few good plays last night (one that I can think of), and you can see why the Eagles nabbed him. Arsenal played well against Liverpool. The Gunners, as they are known as, were not in top form, however. They got the win, though, and that's all that counts.

Stomach still upset. Nerves shattered. That stupid I Got Clocked! commercial is on. I wonder if they will make a clock of Adolph Hitler or Jeffrey Dahmer. I should call and find out. "I wanna clock Hitler!" They do say "whoever" in the commercial. Maybe i should take a random picture of someone, get the clock made and send it to them. That would be creepy. "Honey, did you do this? No? Who the hell would do this?"


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