Close Enough to Death to Smell It

From my window, it looks like a full moon.  It gives off enough light to be a full moon.  I had my blinds open, the sliding glass doors letting in the lunar medusa's cold, white light.  That, the light from this laptop and the display screen of the Bose were the only light I had as I wrote my manuscript.  My stomach, for whatever reason (not stress) was not agreeing with me.  Now, as I write this, the moon is still out there, hanging with a glib ease for the delight for anyone who is awake to see.

My stomach is even worse, and I woke up at four to vomit.  That's one thing I really hate.  Vomiting.  It's such a violent act.  I don't do it often.  I don't do it well.  I'm still debating whether or not I'll make it into work today, and for those who know me, that means something.

Perhaps it's this heat Eureka has been experiencing.  74 degrees.  That, my friends, is uncivilized. 

My friend, who shall remain nameless for now, was teasing me a bit about the heat last night.  She was telling me that the temperature where she was happened to be an ungodly number.  I was complaining about our heat wave, and she basically told me there was no real comparison.  Granted, based on pure numbers she is correct, but once you become acclimated to something it's hard to step outside that comfort zone.  Her 300 degrees was having the same affect as my 74.  (No, it wasn't really 300 degrees, but it felt like it I'm sure.)

She is a dear friend, a gem amongst mouth-breathing space wasters, but her love of 85 degree weather makes me question her mental stability.

A recent study found that Hitler may have Jewish and black roots.  People seem stunned that he may be "related" to people he "despised."  Don't a lot of people hate their family?  What is this supposed to accomplish anyway?  Show he was a hypocrite?  Most people are.  Make us think he was self-loathing?  Again -- not unusual.  People are always trying to destroy the "myth" of Hitler, but the sad truth is was that he was an average guy who was a good speaker and who held people up to standards he could not meet.  That's the scary part.  He wasn't a monster.  He was just like you and me, and the more people consider him this kind of super beast the less likely they are to see it when it comes around again.  I suppose knowing Hitler's DNA roots (which I didn't think were a mystery, as I have heard the Jewish angle before) interests people in some strange way, but acting surprised about it speaks volumes to just how little we have learned from the conditions that led to the Nazis and the people who supported them. 

This information was reported as news.  I'm not sure what makes it entirely newsworthy.  I'm not sure what kind of new information can be brought to light to help people understand any of that any better because it's not a problem of understanding Hitler.  It's a problem of understanding us.  We are bad at seeing the threats around us.  We are easily led.  We don't speak out against evil for fear of going against the group.  When those are the conditions, Hitler-like episodes and leaders are concomitant.

The moon is gone.  My stomach is killing me.  People remain as dim as bulbs about to blow.  And based upon the sun that is coming from between the blinds, it looks like the heat will return.

I remain ... driven.

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