A Letter To Obama

Mr. President,

You've taken some heat lately for a handshake, a ritual done throughout the civilized world, with Chavez, a man whom many in this country think is another incarnation of Satan. Oddly enough, you haven't taken so much heat over not going after torturers and the men who gave them their orders, which includes most of the Bush administration.

How the hell are you going to discipline your girls when they hit the rebellious years? "But Dad, I'm just a half hour late. Bush caused people to die and he gets off scott-free while I lose use of the car for a month? How is that fair?" She's right.

You can't say torture is bad and then not do anything about it. You can't tell other countries that America is somehow different now under your regime, but not go after the people who started an illegal war. Bush and his people are war criminals by even the loosest of definitions. War criminals need to be tried for their crimes. You aren't even suggesting that. What kind of message does that send? Business as usual. Sure, you may not be ordering torture, but there's nothing stopping Cheney from serving in some future administration. You could help change that, but you aren't.

The men who actually did the torturing of hostages (and that's what a lot of them were)? They were just "following orders." Brilliant.

And people are upset about a handshake. A handshake! How is Chavez worse than Bush? Because Bush is a monster, but he's our monster? Chavez is a foreign monster? Chavez is so evil, he gave Obama a book! I know that the Fox demographic, which consists mainly of beer-swilling pedophiles, thinks books are learning tools and are therefore instruments of the devil, but come on. Obama likes to read. (Again, for the Fox crowd, reading is something you do with books.)

Obama, you, like Clinton and like Bush in many respects, take heat for all the wrong things. (Bush didn't take enough heat for his policies and actions, but the did get more than enough criticism for his vocabulary.) You need to do the right thing and go after our criminals, the ones still walking free in America. Just make sure you don't shake Bush's hand. You've already touched one too many "monsters" this month.