The Rapture is Coming And I Hope it Takes These People

There are a certain group of people (quite large if you believe the numbers in this article) who enjoy something called "planking."  (One of them has thankfully died.)  Planking means ... well, just look at the picture at the left.  It pretty much tells you everything you need to know.

This is apparently pretty popular amongs the same group that engages in mass e-mails and social networking wars.  In other words: the idiot masses.

The man who died doing this (seems unlikely that such a non-activity would cause death) was planking on a balcony on a high rise when he tumbled off.  I wonder if his last thought before he splattered on the sidewalk was, "I'm a dumb ass!"  I hope someone got a picture of that.

I understand that people engage in pointless activities every day (it's called work), and I understand that many get a kick out of it.  It's cute, like flash mobs with less movement.  But when you start declaring this an "alternative sport" and join a Facebook page for it where you can post your own planking photos ... well, there may be something wrong with the gray matter between your ears.

I will say, however, that the idea that people will mimic a board seems quite fitting to me.  They are about as interesting as one and have as much intelligence as one.  If I see a planker, I'm going to grab a handful of nails and a hammer and get a little Roman on them.  Then I'll see if I can start a Facebook movement for that.

The Rapture is coming (this is science FACT) on May 21 ... or so (the guy who is saying this has been wrong a couple of times in the past, but he's not wrong this time ... maybe).  Here's to hoping it is real and it takes these people up into Heaven where they can plank between clouds or on the the backs of angels.  It fills my heart with warmth just to picture it.